"Come to the edge"                             
"We might fall"
"Come to the edge"
"It's too high"
"Come to the edge"
 And they came
 And they leapt *

Choosing to Leap?

Are you at the edge of a cliff, wanting to leap across to the genuinely greener grass on the other side - but scared of falling, of failing, of getting it wrong?

Or are you standing on the beach at the edge of the ocean, looking out towards the horizon and longing to set sail to new and unexplored lands?

Maybe you're just on the edge of your seat? Excited and energised, ready to go, ready for a change - but not quite sure which direction to take?

Someone recently said to me "I'm rubbish at change" - and many people feel apprehensive at the idea of replacing the known and familiar with the unknown and unfamiliar. Maybe it will be better. But maybe it will be worse? Our minds seem to be much more skilled at imagining disaster scenarios than success scenarios.

And yet .......

"Only when we fear regret more than failure is our greatness allowed to truly emerge." Jen Groover

Jen Groover is a business woman and entrepreneur, as are some of my clients. Many others  work in the public or not-for-profit sectors and may have very different dreams.

In a recent survey, people over 65 were asked :
"If you could live your life over, what would you do differently?”

They answered :
1. I’d take more time to stop and ask the big questions.
2. I’d be more courageous and take more risks in work and love.
3. I’d try to live with purpose – to make a difference.

Accessing your 'greatness' just means being the best you can be, fulfilling your potential and having the courage to live your life to the full. If you are ready for this - for new horizons and new adventures - but would like to "look before you leap", I would love to support you. To help you achieve clarity about what it is you really want; to act to achieve it and, while doing so, to balance courage with wisdom.

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power"  Alan Cohen, author of "Chicken Soup for Souls"

 .. Or Were You Pushed?

Change isn't always something that we choose. Sometimes life decides for us. There is a status quo with which we may feel happy and comfortable, or bored and stuck , but in either case there is an overall sense of familiarity. We will have developed a range of assumptions -  about how things are and what to expect - that work well enough, most of the time, in most situations. For example, “I will stay in this job, in this place, until I choose to leave” or “I will continue in a relationship with my current partner”. Then something or someone pulls the rug out from under us in the form of redundancy, relationship breakdown, children leaving home, retirement, an unexpected re-evaluation of our sexual identity, ill health, bereavement or some other major life event.

We are now in unfamiliar territory, out of our comfort  zone. Life is unpredictable, our usual behaviours may not work. We may feel stressed, confused, afraid, hurt, uncomfortable, out of control, elated, a sense of urgency, or some other strong emotion. We may ricochet from one feeling to another. Our behavior can become very unpredictable.This is all a natural part of the change process but can become destabilising and immobilising if it goes on for too long. Making decisions is difficult. We don't want to create even more chaos.

This is often the point where people decide to work with a coach. They realise that these situations, although often uninvited and unwanted, are also opportunities to re-evaluate their values and priorities and, on that basis, to make new choices that in many cases may lead to something better than the previous status quo. Rather than continuing to feel like a victim of circumstances they are willing to explore a new perspective where their stress is used as a trigger for creative thinking and new beginnings.

There are many many things in life over which we have no control.

Our power lies in how we choose to respond to them.

 
 

 

 

 

 

* (adapted from a poem by Christopher Logue)