Life is not only "one damn thing after another", it's also one transition after another
Things change - in both small and large ways - whether we want them to or not. Some people fear and resist change, others enjoy and deliberately generate it. Some transitions are initiated because of a desire to change aspects of our life or of situations that no longer serve us. Others are imposed upon us by other people or external circumstances. There have been times in my life when I 'threw all the balls into the air' just for the interesting and fun project of creating a new reality
When I first started working as a coach in 2002 I thought it was such a magical process that I couldn't understand why everybody didn't want to work with a coach. It was pointed out to me that 1) many people fear change and 2) many people fear taking the inner journey of self-knowledge that creating transformational change requires. This stunned me as my lifetime commitment has been to personal development and self-empowerment and supporting others to do the same. Of course, that's not true for everybody
Coaching 'life transitions' is really coaching any change that people feel they need some support with. Sometimes with the decision-making process, sometimes with implementation, often with both. And indeed, I had a lot of help and support myself during the early years of my journey - from workshops and receiving coaching myself
"A couple of years ago, I was at a very low point in my life. I was jobless, directionless and terribly heartbroken from the split of a long term relationship. I did not know how to fit into this world. I had no dreams and certainly no self esteem and felt old way beyond my years. I am ashamed to say, I felt quite worthless and thought there was no hope for me. It was a bleak place to be. When I first spoke to Lynda I believed I was a lost cause, and was very resistant to the small steps she was asking me to take. I thought them insignificant - just a further illustration of how small I’d become. However before very long, I began to notice some small changes, and began to open up more to the coaching process. The small things pretty soon became bigger things. And so the process had begun; of Lynda helping me move from a very dark place to a light place. .. Using her skills and experience she kitted me out with a special tool bag for life, tools which I previously did not have…she challenged my negativity, and helped me to understand the destructive patterns that had been with me all my life, and helped me replace them with healthy positive ones. The support I get constantly blows me away. She is pragmatic but also truly wants to help improve your life and so comes to coaching from a genuine and generous place. .. After every call I feel bigger, clearer and more able for this, at times very challenging, world. Her help to me has been invaluable during a very difficult and transitional time in my life. It is lovely to know that there is help available on the end of a phone if you need it! Within a year my life changed enormously, I put in a lot of work, and I now have a blossoming career. I am clearer about what I want, which direction I need my life to move in, my self esteem is the best it has ever been, I have even opened myself to having a relationship again, but best of all – I’ve got my dreams back. I feel incredibly lucky to have met and worked with Lynda and will always be grateful to her for her guidance." KW
How I work with clients
Depending upon the specific situation, many of the activities and exercises referred to in the 'Ageing with Purpose' programme can be helpful. I have used a very similar structure when working with people who want to change the way they earn a living, as well as those looking for a change in overall lifestyle
At the heart of the journey, the most important and powerful part, are the
coaching sessions, which are unique to the client. These sessions will be a 'dance' - often led by the client, sometimes by me
There will be powerful themes and approaches which run thoughout all the coaching
These facilitate transformation and lead to greater self-empowerment, confidence and self love
They include working with inner dialogue/self-talk, emotional regulation and behavioural control Awareness and Mindfulness are foundational but do not necessarily require a 'hard core'
In recent years there has been much excitement about "rewiring the brain" in order to change, to 'unwire', limiting, unhelpful, disempowering, even destructive, beliefs and habits
The Buddha got excited about all that over 2,000 years ago!! As a 'secular' Buddhist, seeing Buddhism as a science of the mind rather than as a religion, I have been incorporating these themes and practices in my work with clients for almost 30 years
To find out more about the practicalities read Structure & Fees
To see what previous clients have said about their coaching journey with me, read Client Testimonials
Below are some of the specific, real life, transitions that led people to choose to work with me
- "I’m feeling stuck at work. I like the organisation and enjoy many aspects of my job. But I’m not sure where to go from here"
- "I really need a change. I’ve stayed in this job for financial reasons and security but I would love to be doing something that fills me with a sense of excitement and anticipation when I wake up in the morning - maybe in a different sector, maybe self-employed"
- "I’ve got a good job but I’ve reached a stage in my life where I’d like to be making more of a difference, contributing more in some way. Is it possible to make a difference and make a living?"
- "There’s never enough time, I always feel rushed and, no matter how hard I try, I can’t find enough time or energy for my family/friends/interests/fun/studying"
- "I wish I were more confident and better at setting boundaries. I say ‘yes’ when I want to say ‘no’ and let people get away with things that really aren’t OK with me"
- "I really need to make a decision about ..........But I'm worried about making the wrong decision and keep going round in circles. I just don't know how to decide"
- "I'm having a really difficult time at work with my manager/boss/team/a colleague. It's making me very unhappy and i don't know where to get any help with the situation"
- "I enjoy being a leader/manager and I want to do it really well. But managing people is challenging and I don’t feel I’m getting the training or support that I need"
- "I've been trying to get my business off the ground, but so far it's not happening"
- "My business is going well but I feel as though I'm going under. How can I get better organised and stay "ahead of the game"
- "I’ve been feeling quite down and anxious recently and just don’t seem to be able to move forward – but I've had therapy/counselling before and it doesn't feel like what I need at the moment"
- "Life’s good but I have some dreams I’d like to follow. I just don’t seem to be able to find enough time to stay focused on moving forward with them"
- "I really enjoy my art/writing/photography…. – I’d love to do it full-time but I’m scared I wouldn’t be able to make a living from it"
- "I'm feeling lonely, would like more friends, and perhaps I'm ready to find a relationship"
- "My current relationship isn’t really working for me. I can't decide whether to stay or go"
- "I’ve always known I’m gay but I’ve been too scared to tell anyone or to come out. But I don’t want to ‘live a lie’ for the rest of my life"
- "It was such a shock to realise I was attracted to someone of the same sex. I don’t know where to go from here"
- "I’m so stressed and my doctor says my health is at risk. I work all hours and I had a nervous breakdown last year. But I just don’t know where to start. There are so many things that I can’t change"
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